Competitivnessity

I have a lot of it. A whole lot, under the right circumstances. Because most of the time, and most things I do, it's super-duper chilled. Everything's fine and dandy no matter what... if you lose say nothing, if you win say less :D I don't ever even have to worry about "gracious acceptance" of defeat, because I don't really care about the win or the loss.

Everything except bloody fencing! Because I've found something which I can really be good at and I can really put effort into, as well as there being a really awesome friendly competitive atmosphere and opportunity and stuff like that, because no-one dislikes having all the infrastructure handed to them on a silver platter. I just have to put in the life, the soul, and the heart, and then I get back exactly what I give. Sam's First Law on the Conservation of Passion/Effort! Even then, I mean now, I've learned to not get bleak often, not bitch about plain old losing because, hell, it's about the fun, experience, and obviously the medals. Not only that, but learning as a fencer, and getting better from your mistakes for the next competition.

And obviously this applies to everything, even competitive farming (moar on that later!) and StarCraft (very popular in Korea as I'm led to understand), because once you get past the sort of "faffing around amateur" stage, sh*t gets serious, and okes knuckle down for crunch time. Train in three aspects, balanced depending on your sport, from rowing (all physical), to chess (all mental), to curling (all technical), and even rock climbing and fencing (a perfect blend). Prepare. Read a bit. Get shouted at by your coach. Go to big competition. Nerves and chundering. Stuff up. Surprise everyone. Do better than your coach and (although they will never admit this to you) worse than your parents expected, go home satisfied and feeling mighty pleased. Next day, shouting and humiliation sesh because you once again managed to find an nth creative way of stuffing up x. That's competition, tried and tested, and it's worked for every remotely successful athlete so far!

And there's nothing wrong with that, because that process leaves so much to be abused/pulled to your own cause, such as taking 2 years to do what everyone else did in 5. Or something like that. Anyways, what really bugs me isn't even when I lose, although, let's be perfectly honest, I always think, "damn, I should have gotten that parry there...". What really bugs me is not when I use to people younger/older and more frail than me, or people who are (very slightly :P) less experienced or more experienced than me. What bothers me is when I lose to people who are just so over it, they cannot even bother to fence properly, who don't put the time and the effort and the dedication in. Nowhere near as much as we do. Or even try learn something new over multiple competitions. And it's easy for Rob and Landon to say something, and it's different for me to do it. In fact, near-impossible if we're talking about certain individuals...

Over-competitiveness is always always bad, and I'd never do anything super-rash or WAAC in even my foulest of sabre moods. But I know there are lots of people (not even fencers this time) who do. Such as people who's income relies on it! And you can't say that you can understand them... professionalism is not an excuse for gamesmanship! It's one of the most irritating things for me out there: people who don't appreciate competition.

Whatever. Hopefully by next year I shall make the SA team!

So why did I even choose to talk about this? I don't honestly remember, but today we went to the Royal Agricultural Winter Fair. I took one look at the setup, and matrix analysis kicked into gear. Here were people battling, stressing, putting on finishing touches, first-timers, veterans, old, young, different levels of passion and commitment and dedication all etched on different faces.

See, all this philosophical shpeel even applies to farming, for gods' sake! It's honestly a really crazy, unexplored world out there... I find that it's really scary actually. I mean, I've always had respect for diversity, but to be perfectly honest I've never really internalized the fact that something like show farming can be as intense or as nerve-wracking and requiring such skill and experience as our own ballet and fencing. I always kinda thought it was all fought out far before, when you bought and raised your animals, but there is simply so much that goes into the grooming process the day before the show that it's honestly just ridiculous. I saw farmers blow-drying cows, UV-checking for tick and fleas, combing over and over and over again, wiping derrieres, feeding them just the right amount of exactly the right thing... and they must also feel the joy and the sadness and the atmosphere...

Damn, I want to go fencing again. #EpicSabreMoves